Now Playing Tracks

tomhiddles:

#i feel so bad when any guy or girl tries to date his daughter #because you show up at their door and her dad is fuckin’ Thor

Look how badass he is while holding that baby

 #I can imagine him using his Thor voice on her #like when she’s crying in the middle of the night#I can imagine him using his Thor voice on her #like when she’s crying in the middle of the night #WHAT IS WRONG DAUGHTER OF MINE#DO YOU REQUIRE NOURISHMENT#WHY DOTH YOU TORMENT ME SO PRECIOUS ONE 

But what if he used it on the guy who came to the door for his daughter?

TELL ME, MIDGARDIAN. WHAT ARE YOUR INTENTIONS TOWARDS MY DAUGHTER?

I AM OBLIGED TO INFORM YOU NOW THAT ANY DISRESPECT TOWARDS HER SHALL SURELY END POORLY FOR YOU.

WHOSOEVER DATETH MY DAUGHTER

IF HE BE WORTHY

SHALL POSSESS

THE BLESSING OF THOR

and watch when the time comes, he’ll just be like “Hey, mate, treat her good okay? Bring her back before eleven please. Drive safely.”

I THINK WE HAVE TO WORRY MORE ABOUT HER GODFATHER, TOM LOKI HIDDLESTON TBH.

#ohohohohohohohrhioehehehheheh i followed you in my car to make sure you paid for her dinner hehehehehehehehe #i’ll literally come into your house and kill you if you break her heart #hehehehehehee

Someone help me

What the hell.
This is the greatest post in the universe.

Rebloggin for the comments.

Tumblr, why I can’t take you anywhere

(Source: sapfira23)

Anonymous

Anonymous asked:

I want you to rub clay in all of my orifices!!! ;D

There’s only one person that ses the word orifices, and clay in the same sentence.

Jessie, not ever Anon can hide you 

To Tumblr, Love Pixel Union